When The Party's Over
by riverfail
Summary: Cheryl and Toni found each other at a time where they both never thought they ever could.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys tell me what you think about this and if you think i should continue?**

 **im gonna have songs in the beginning of each chapter after this just to have it playing while you read to go with the setting of the chapter. feel free to pm me i really wanna make friends here as much as i can. lifes fucked lol. enjoy.**

Cheryl awoke to the sounds of her mother screaming at the cleaners. She grumbled. Sighing as she opened her eyes and stared at the red ceiling above her as she gathered her thoughts. Almost every morning she hoped to wake up to a normal and happy family who loved and cared for her. But it never happened. And so just like every other start of the school year she gathered and composed herself as she got ready for school. Looking as impeccable as would be possible from a human form. Except if one were to look very closely at Cheryl, they would notice how empty her eyes truly were. Those beautiful wide doe eyes were now devoid of any emotion. It was as if the death of Jason had been the death of Cheryl, and had left behind an empty shell of a human being.

She walked down the spiral staircase not even bothering to walk into the kitchen and eat. Knowing that her mother would punish her for this when she got home, but at this point Cheryl couldn't give _a fuck._ She clutched her bag for dear life as she sat in her convertible. She began driving as fast as she possibly could.

She turned the volume up as the song blasted through the speakers,

 _They say we can't stay in America_ _  
You can't be free in America  
But I'm sick of listening to everyone  
I just want you, oh  
I just want you, oh  
I just want you, oh_

There were 2 hours till her next class, and so she took the next left onto the highway, crossing the bridge connecting her to the Southside. She drove down the long winding road, the trees blowing with the cold wind as her hair flew behind her, a heavy contrast to the dark blue skies and ivy green leaves of the forest around her. She breathed in the air as if it were her last few breaths on earth. And to Cheryl, it may as well have been.

Her brother had left her and now she was left alone. Alone in the midst of a crowd. She could feel her heart sinking, almost as if it were a physical blow to her chest. Gripping the wheel she forced herself to remain present. She didn't want to go deep into her thoughts today. She had to keep it together. Finding a small clearing opening to a small road she turned towards it stopping at the dead end.

 _Come on Cheryl you can do this. It's just a few hours of your day don't slip up. Just don't._ She kept her head resting on the steering wheel before reaching into her bag and pulling out a pack of Marlboro Reds. Grateful for her convertible and her ability to smoke without worrying about her car reeking of tobacco. Flicking her lighter on, she took a long drag, filling her lungs with the substance before closing her eyes and inhaling. Her head almost immediately feeling heavier than usual. It was as if the stress she went through just immediately dissipated. She felt complete. It was a habit she picked up a year ago and now she couldn't seem to stop. _She didn't want to stop._

All of a sudden the sound of twigs snapping and someone's footsteps caused her to whip forward. Her hazy brain causing her to look around in confusion.

"Who's there?" she said calmly. Not really caring if it could possibly be a serial killer out to kill her. But it wasn't a serial killer. As she stepped into the light, her pink highlighted hair shone out of the dark atmosphere. The first thing Cheryl noticed were her eyes. They were beautiful. And they were looking right at her.

"What the fuck? How the hell did you get here?" she asked, her voice as soothing as honey.

"I clearly drove here," she scoffed. "How the hell did _you_ get here? Who are you anyways?"

The girl's eyes drifted towards the cigarette dangling in Cheryl's hand. She nodded towards it.

"Got anymore?" she asked.

 _Fuck it._ Cheryl thought. And took the box out of her bag. As soon as she caught sight of the box she smiled slightly, walking towards the passenger seat and jumping in with ease. And Cheryl didn't stop her. Suddenly she didn't mind not being so alone.

Taking one of the cigarettes out of the box she looked at Cheryl questioningly. Confused she tilted her head.

"What is it?" she whispered. Not wanting to disturb the peaceful atmosphere.

"I don't know how to conjure up fire with my hands. Lighter?" she said softly.

"Oh of course, sorry I'm not thinking straight at the moment." She muttered as she handed her the lighter.

"Same." She said. _Was she flirting?_

She tried flicking it on and turned it to the side. Sighing Cheryl felt terrible and went to take a last drag of her cigarette before she gave it to her. Completely confused as to why she was being so generous. But before she could do so, her face was being tilted to the side, cigarette still in her mouth. Her heart began pounding. How long had it been since someone had touched her so softly. All she ever knew for the past year was the harsh and painful slaps of her mother.

And her already lit cigarette was pushed further into her mouth as the pink haired girl placed hers softly onto it inhaling as she looked directly into Cheryl's eyes. And just as quickly as that had happened, her hands were gone and she was resting her head on the seat as she took a long drag inhaling the smoke. Cheryl remained silent as she looked away taking a huge drag of her own cigarette.

"Give me your phone I want to play a song I've been obsessed with these days." She said as she placed her hand out. She grabbed her iPhone, typing in the password and passed it to her.

 _Don't you know I'm no good for you?_

 _I've learned to lose you, can't afford to_

 _Tore my shirt to stop you bleedin'_

 _But nothin' ever stops you leavin'_

She looked towards the pink haired girl, her heart sinking at the lyrics. She was staring towards the trees, tears welling up but she continued to stop herself from doing so.

The song continued and for some reason Cheryl felt curious. She wanted to know what was going on with the girl who sat next to her. Maybe it was the fact that this was the first person she had interacted with in almost a 4 months. But she wanted to know why she looked as sad as her.

"Hey is everything okay?" she whispered turning the music down to just a soft background.

She scoffed. Flicking the ashes to the side.

" _Fuck_ people. Am I right?"

Cheryl stared at her, almost in awe.

"Exactly." She said as she smiled slightly.

They both sat in silence as her playlist continued. It was almost time for her classes to start and at the same time she felt as if she could stay here, in silence. Sitting next to the pink haired girl. Feeling something she hasn't felt in years. Contentment.

But of course all good things come to an end and the girl flicked her cigarette butt on the soil as she hopped out of the car, walking towards Cheryl. Cheryl watched her every move. Feeling sad at the prospect of leaving, but also the prospect of never seeing this girl again.

She leaned down to rest on the window.

"Thank you. For sharing your cigarette and letting me hang out with you when it's pretty clear you came here to be alone." She said as she flicked her eyes towards Cheryl's lips, almost immediately bringing herself to look at her eyes again.

Cheryl caught herself doing the same.

"You're welcome. I'm Cheryl by the way." She said softly. Her heart already feeling heavy having forgotten how it felt to have someone around her who she felt connected to. She felt the loneliness creep up on her again as the girl walked back letting her start her car and reverse.

"My names Toni. I come here almost every morning before work. You should come hang whenever you can Cheryl." She said. And Cheryl once more found herself amazed at this girl's sultry voice.

"Of course. Whenever I'm not busy." She said smiling softly. As she reached the main road she turned around to see Toni wave at her. She waved back. And as she began her drive to Riverdale high, she reached for her phone, realizing that her packet of cigarettes were gone. She would have to come back sometime and see if Toni was still there. And for some reason Cheryl found herself looking forward to it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey. Hope you guys like it. had a shit day today but whats new. I just graduated high school and now its uni and I don't know what degree I wanna do or anythings sooo yes lll write this fic instead lol.**

 **The Stars – The XX**

"Oh my God Cheryl!"

Immediately smiling and closing her locker, Cheryl walked towards Veronica.

"Veronica. How are you this wonderful school day?" she said with as much sarcasm as she could muster.

Rolling her eyes Veronica sighed and intertwined her arms with Cheryl's as they began to walk to their Extension Literature class. Only 10 people had been accepted into the course due to not only their interest in literature but also due to their incredibly excelling grades in their normal English class.

"Honestly? It's been horrible. I know it's our last year and everything but Archie and I are having problems…" she began to drone on in the typical 'Veronica way' as Cheryl just agreed and nodded where it was necessary.

They arrived in class and sat at the very front, Veronica still continuing their very one-sided conversation. But Cheryl enjoyed it. Veronicas continuous chattering would help calm her subconscious thoughts. And so Cheryl sat through her class with Veronica whispering all the mundane gossip which she had missed during the past few months where she had been gone.

The professor passed around the book they were meant to read for the term. She smiled as she saw the title of 'The Bell Jar' by Sylvia Plath laid out in front of her. One of her favourite novels. She was already beginning to process the theories and texts she would use to analyse it and anticipated the days ahead for this subject.

"So what about you? How was New Zealand? Did you meet any cute boys? I want all the details Cheryl Bombshell." She giggled as they walked towards the bleachers to cheer on Veronica's on-off boyfriend Archie.

"It was great. Not any cute boys but I did have a great time Veronica." She lied. No one had fathomed that Cheryl blossom would be spending her time at home in her room but that's exactly what she did. After texting her friends telling them she'll be far away, Cheryl closed herself off. And after the crazy year she had, she allowed herself to truly mourn the loss of her brother. Although she needed to do so, it almost awakened a dark part of her which she had no idea resided within.

It was obvious to all that something was wrong with Cheryl. She had changed. And at this point, she couldn't care less what people thought. For the one person who truly mattered to her was gone. Probably a pile of bones in a coffin by now. And as she thought of her perfect and dear brother no longer being there, a tear slipped out of her eyes. And she couldn't seem to stop the thoughts.

The thoughts of her brother's bones now lying fleshless in a dark and most probably damp coffin. She wondered whether he could hear her as she screamed inside of her body. She felt her hands begin to shake as her heart began racing.

 _Fuck not right now._ She thought to herself. Willing her anxiety to leave her. But the more she tried to calm down the more she could see her brother's bones. Lying there. Just a vessel that he had now left.

She glanced at her phone and saw she had 10 minutes till morning break. Just ten minutes and then she can drive somewhere and smoke for a bit. And that's when she remembered that her cigarettes weren't with her anymore.

She got up and grabbed her bag. Not caring as Veronica shot her a confused look and called after her. She needed to smoke. At least one cigarette, to calm herself down. One, and she would be fine. She found herself running to her car to get to the petrol station in time.

She was never questioned for buying them as she had Reggie make her a fake I.D. He thought it was for her to get into clubs, but little did he know that Cheryl had a bigger addiction than this. She could already feel herself calming down. Just at the very _thought_ of a cigarette. And the sad thing was that Cheryl knew she was addicted. She knew she had a problem. But she didn't want to get rid of it. If there was something she could do which helped her feel _happy,_ then why should she ever stop?

She grabbed the cigarettes and lighter off the counter, the cashier already knowing what she was coming in for as she threw a wad of cash at her.

Not bothering to take the change, she went back to her car, immediately opening up the big red and white box as she removed the cigarette. Starting the car she began to drive towards the school with a lit cigarette in her mouth. Not caring if anyone saw. She kept her focus on the road even as she felt her head relax, the last thing she needed was an accident. Finishing the cigarette, she threw the butt outside and pulled into the school parking grounds once more.

 _Thank god, I can show my face to everyone the bell isn't going to ring for another 20 minutes._

She walked around the school, not bothering to go to the cafeteria and walking straight towards her table of friends.

Veronica instantly shot her a troubled look as Cheryl felt her eyes immediately roll to the back of her head. Almost on instinct.

"Cheryl are you okay? What happened during the game?"

"What? What happened?" Betty asked immediately.

"Hello to you too cousin. Looks like you really haven't learn to keep your nose out of other people's business during the holidays." She said as she sat next to Kevin immediately getting enveloped in a hug by him.

"fuck Cheryl I know you must have been out fucking hot guys halfway across the world but that doesn't mean you can just not respond to my texts!" he said.

"Sorry Kevin, I just wanted to be alone for a while I guess." She mumbled.

And she knew that no one would ask her how she was coping because she had told them never to bring up Jason and they were merely listening to what she had told them to do but at the same time she found herself wishing for someone to ask her how she was feeling. To tell her everything was going to be okay.

But she knew that wasn't going to happen. And she just had to accept it.

They all went to class and the day went by quicker than she thought it could. Relieved she drove out of school and back to the highway. She couldn't help hoping that Toni might be sitting there or show up. But the rational part of her knew there was a slim chance of that happening.

She pulled up to the side of the road and just sat there for a while, the music playing softly in the background. It was crazy how one person leaving could change her life completely. She didn't understand how much she had depended on him until he left. And she knew her life would never be the same.

A tear fell down her porcelain like face and she immediately wiped it away. _I can't be fucking weak. I just can't._

Cheryl knew that when she got home her mother would not let her go without addressing her leaving the house this morning. And she knew there was no avoiding it. But a part of her always wondered what would happen if she just ran away. Would her mother even care? She scoffed.

Of course she would. Wouldn't want people knowing the famous Blossom family had issues right?

 _I will never be happy will I Jason?_ She thought to herself.

"Fuck you! Fuck you Jason! You fucking left me!" she screamed as she slammed her hands on the wheel. She could feel herself losing control as she mumbled to herself crying and continuing to slam her hands on the wheel.

"Woah what did that car ever do to you?" she heard an amused voice say suddenly.

Cheryl yelped and looked towards the trees where Toni was leaning, her head cocked to the side. Until she saw Cheryl's unshed tears and immediately softened her face and walked towards her.

"Cheryl?"

"I'm _fine."_

 _"_ I didn't say you weren't. What's up?" she said as she walked towards her and leant against the car.

"Honestly nothing. I'm fine so stop asking Toni." She said as she sighed and went towards her pack.

"Oh shit that reminds me here." She took out the pack of cigarettes from her jacket pocket and handed them to Cheryl. She shook her head.

"Keep it. I got another one."

"Whatever you say I'm not turning down a free pack."

They stayed there in silence as Cheryl smoked for a while before Toni took one out of her packet. And just like that morning, she took Cheryl's face in her hands and lit it up. Smiling at her slightly. Cheryl relished her touch and as quick as it had come, it left. Cheryl saw her knuckles red and bruised and looked at her confused.

Toni sighed. "I had a shit day at work. This guy wanted me to go home with him and he was drunk out of his mind so I had to tell him to back off."

"Where do you work?"

"At a bar."

"Oh. That sounds… interesting."

Toni chuckled. "I'm not going to lie it can be. But I guess it's also kind of sad. The people who come in during the daytime are just on another level of sad I guess. They aren't there to have fun and enjoy life. They just come in to forget everything." She stared off into the trees and Cheryl couldn't help staring.

Her jaw-line and her perfect nose. And Cheryl didn't feel envious. She felt... enraptured.

"Well I had a shitty day at school too but I guess nothing can compare to having a drunk person try and get with you." She said the last part almost to herself.

"Hey everyone has bad days that doesn't mean you compare it to others and try and tell yourself it wasn't bad." She said with a smile. Her voice filled with meaning.

"Yeah I guess not." Cheryl said softly as she found herself smiling once more.

"You know what's sad?" she asked.

"Do tell."

"This is the second time I've truly felt happy today. Actually happy." She said staring into Toni's dark brown eyes.

"And when was the first time?"

"This morning."

"Well do you want to hear something sad too?"

And Toni stared at her, leaning in close as if she was about to tell her a secret. "same." She whispered.

And so they both stayed there for as long as they could. Before Cheryl had to leave. Knowing she couldn't avoid the wrath of her mother for any longer.

"Can I see you tomorrow?" she said, feeling bolder than usual.

"Sure. See you then Cheryl." She said with a wink. And then she leant down and hugged her. Cheryl hugged her back, not wanting this feeling of comfort that had surrounded their little space to end.

"I'll see you around Toni." She said as she waved to her.

"Bye Cher."

 _Cher. She called me Cher._

And so Cheryl drove home, relishing the feeling as much as she could. Until she rolled up to the driveway of her house. And there stood her mother. Waiting. She walked out of the car, taking as long as she could to walk up the steps.

"Get. In." she snarled.

Cheryl felt her heart sink as soon as the door slammed. Not knowing what would happen.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys. Another update I hope this is enjoyable. Feel free to pm me or become friends.**

 **The worst – Jhene Aiko**

The sound of her slap echoed through the desolate house.

"Where exactly did you run off to this morning?"

Cheryl just stood there. Looking down and not answering her. For she knew that there really wasn't a point because any answer Cheryl would give her would not satisfy.

"I asked you a question."

And Cheryl's head was yanked up by her hands. She almost couldn't help the look of disgust as she pulled back. She sighed and turned to walk away. Not wanting her mother to do any more than she had done.

"Just like Jason. You never fucking listen. You'll end up just like him Cheryl. And I hope I'm alive to see the day it happens."

She froze. Turning around, her palpable anger causing her to move forward till she was looking right at Penelope.

"Leave Jason out of this. Don't ever say shit about him again."

Her mother's eyes widened as she slapped her once more. Harder this time and Cheryl tasted the metallic blood through her teeth. But she persevered. Sick of her mother's fucked up mentality.

"You can hit me all you _fucking_ want. I hate you. And that's never going to change." She spat out tears filling her eyes.

And that was the first time her mother punched her. Cheryl felt herself fall before her head hit the ground with a bang. She started to get up before she felt a weight on her ribs. Struggling to breathe she looked up at the woman before her. Her _mother._

"You will _never_ speak to me like that again, Cheryl. Am I clear?"

She stayed silent, gritting her teeth as she stared back defiantly. And Penelope waited. For she knew that her daughter was not as strong as she let on. And soon, after feeling her ribs move slightly, Cheryl screamed out.

"Fine okay okay get off me I won't do that again." She screamed as she felt blood trickle down her mouth.

"good." She said, and walked back to her room. Not looking back once. Almost as if this whole thing had never happened.

And Cheryl lay there. For what seemed like hours, tears now mixing with the blood as she stared at the large oak doors ahead of her. Wishing for Jason to step in and see what her mother had done.

 _But he isn't here to save you Cheryl. No one is._

She groaned and whimpered as she lifted herself off the hardwood floors and struggled up the steps, holding her now bruised and swollen chest as if to keep her heart from falling out. She stepped into the shower and stared down at her now red chest, and she wasn't sad. She was angry. Angry at herself. Her mother. Jason. Life.

Cheryl knew that there would be no one to help her except her own self. And she wanted to trust herself. But she couldn't. She knew that almost everything that she could stop she would never have the courage to. As she lay in bed that night trying as hard as she could to sleep, she felt her mind drift off to Toni. Maybe because she knew she needed to think about something that would calm her, and surprisingly Cheryl found herself drifting to sleep as she dreamt of car rides on the highway and laughter.

 _Oh fuck me._

Cheryl looked in the mirror and saw the dark purple and blue bruises on her face scattered around her cheek. Her eye so bloodshot her pupils stuck out strikingly. There was no way she was going to school today. No way. She wore an old shirt and a pair of sweatpants as she walked downstairs, still taking her backpack just in case her mother questioned her.

Penelope was waiting by the kitchen door, and Cheryl stared at her as she walked past.

"Is your eye okay."

 _Does it look fucking okay you bitch?_

"Yes its fine thanks." She said in a monotonous voice.

"I'm going to be staying at Veronica's this weekend so I won't be coming back after school. We have an assignment we have to work on together."

Well I want to know when you get to hers and I want you back the next morning before school."

"Yes okay. Bye." Cheryl grabbed her coffee mug and an orange, walking out of the house immediately.

She was shocked her mother didn't ridicule her choice of clothing today but realised she must have some sort of guilt present in her.

The sky was a dark blue and the trees were a darker green than usual as a light drizzle was felt on her face. She smiled and closed her eyes, absorbing the atmosphere before sitting in her car and driving away. Cheryl knew she had to keep the top on for her car today because as much as she enjoyed the rain, she couldn't risk her car being spoilt. It was the only thing which helped her escape from everything.

She drove to her spot. Knowing Toni would be there and feeling herself anticipate it even more.

Pulling up under the shade of the trees, the now downpour of rain was more or less caught by the leaves of the giant trees as she looked around for her. Grabbing her cigarette pack she walked out of the car, not caring about getting wet as she walked to the centre of a clearing sitting underneath a small tree as she lit her cigarette. Keeping it under her palm as she inhaled. And she heard Toni giggle as she came to sit next to her, she ducked her head under as they sat side by side.

"Hey girl."

"Hey Toni. How's your morning been?" Cheryl asked softly as she continued to smoke, staring ahead at the surroundings in front of her as the rain poured around them, almost like background noise.

"Pretty okay I guess. What about you?"

"It's been okay for me too."

She turned slightly to catch a glimpse of Toni's face, feeling the same mesmerisation as she did whenever she saw her.

"Shouldn't you be at school right now?"

"I don't feel like going today. Why aren't you at work?"

"I got the late night shift today so I'm free the whole day today."

Toni took out her own cigarette. But since the rain was pouring she walked towards the trees on the other end to light her own one. And that's when she saw Cheryl's bruises.

She ran back to the girl under the slight shade and took her face in her hands, turning her other side towards her and gasping. Cheryl stayed silent as Toni continued to look at her with concern.

"Who the fuck did this." She said through gritted teeth.

She pushed her face away and looked ahead, taking another drag of her cigarette before answering.

"It's nothing. I just fell down the stairs this morning."

" _Bullshit_ Cheryl. I know a mark from someone else when I see one. So I'm going to ask you again. Who did this?"

Cheryl felt her walls move back up and she tried to calm down as much as she could. She couldn't risk making Toni angry. She seemed to be the only person Cheryl actually tolerated,

"Toni. Drop it. please." She said softly looking at Toni who continued to look at her bruised cheek.

"Did you ice it at least?"

"No it isn't really hurting I don't see the point."

Toni rolled her eyes as she told her what to do. And Cheryl knew she should be focusing on what Toni is telling her to do but she just kept staring at her eyes, silently admiring how worn out they looked. As if they had seen everything.

"Earth to Cheryl? Did you hear anything I just said?"

"Y-yeah I did."

Toni laughed slightly. "No you didn't."

Cheryl sighed and threw her cigarette butt away and got up. Walking directly into the downpour of rain before laying on the grass, closing her eyes.

And after Toni finished hers, she did the same.

They lay there for almost an hour, and as their hands slowly inched together, Toni enclasped them. And Cheryl felt her heart almost physically hurt. But not in a bad way. It felt good. So she looked towards Toni and smiled with her doing the same.

Toni broke the silence by speaking softly. "Do you want to spend the day together? We can just hang out, ride around town and listen to music?"

"I would love that Toni."

"great." she said as she got up. Pulling Cheryl up with her in ease. She groaned slightly as her back straightened which didn't go unnoticed with Toni, who decided she would bring it up later.

She started walking towards the opposite area.

"Toni! My car is over here." Cheryl said as she gestured towards her car,

"I want to take my bike. Come on it'll be fun I promise." She said pleadingly.

And so Cheryl went to grab her phone and money from the car before locking the doors and following Toni. A part of her fearful on the prospect of riding a motorbike. But she pushed it aside, for after last night she knew she had to grow up. And she had to enjoy her life because she didn't know when she would end it.

It was beautiful. A pure black and gold Harley that fit Toni almost perfectly.

"It's amazing isn't it? I got it custom made for myself. Hell even the helmet has inbuilt earphones and everything. Here." She said as she placed it onto Cheryl's head.

She sat forward and started the engine. Cheryl's heart lurched slightly as it roared to life.

"Hey come on relax, I know what I'm doing I've been riding for years." She said as she patted the back of her motorbike. Cheryl sighed and lifted her leg up to straddle it, almost immediately feeling the stability with which Toni was able to balance it and calming down instantly.

And suddenly she felt music play softly inside the helmet. Toni grabbed her hands and placed them around her waist. She hugged her tightly and could feel herself calm down as she held her. Both of them soaked with the rain which continued to pour down, but they didn't care. Simply enjoying the feeling of each other so close. And Toni was off.

Cheryl found herself not caring where they were going, or what they were doing. As long as she was with Toni, _she was okay._


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey im back. hows life for you guys? id love to know since mines the most boring its ever been lol.**

 **yeah right - Joji**

The rain seemed to get heavier with each new road they took and Cheryl absolutely relished it. She had dreamed of just being outside during the rain but her mother had always locked the doors to the house or ended up striking her if she came back home soaked, and so she stopped enjoying it. Until today that is.

Toni remained silent during the ride, not once stopping and moving so smoothly through the roads which Cheryl had never been on. The slight bumps causing her to hold onto Toni tighter and she could practically feel Toni chuckle.

As Cheryl felt the rain continue to poor onto her skin and down her neck she never felt more at peace. They ended up slowing down and coming to the outside of what looked like an abandoned building. She got off the motorbike, removing the helmet and looking around confused.

"Where are we? This is literally an abandoned building."

Toni began walking towards it gesturing for Cheryl to follow her who silently did so. Toni knocked on the door and a large muscular tanned boy walked out, a snake tattoo clearly visible on his neck.

"Yo Toni what's up your shift isn't till night what are you doing here." He said with a deep voice.

"Hey Sweet Pea, I thought you wouldn't mind if Cheryl and I went up to the top and sat down for a bit? Oh yeah this is Sweet Pea my brother." she said as she looked towards Cheryl with a smile.

"Oh hello."

"Hi Cheryl what's up?" he said with a grin.

"Okay that's enough getting to know each other we're gonna go." She said as she walked past him with Cheryl following.

It wasn't an abandoned building after all. It was a large space with at least 50 men sitting down on different chairs and near a bar drinking, laughing and watching a baseball game on TV occasionally giving shouts of cheers or moans. Cheryl looked around and then looked back at Toni; the small girl looked so out of place but so at home at the same time. She jumped over the bar towards the bartender and grabbed two red bulls out of the bottom cooler. And jumping back over with agility came to stop near Cheryl once more.

"Come on there's a place up top we can sit and chill for a bit. That is if you want to?" she said with slight concern.

"Yeah sure that's fine." Cheryl mumbled, still slightly intimidated by her surroundings.

They went towards a small flight of stairs that creaked with every step they took. Opening the door Toni took her over to a small couch where they both sat down as Toni opened the can for Cheryl.

"So this is where you work?" Cheryl asked.

"Yeah. It looks like a dump but this place and the people here are my home. They're my family honestly and I can't think of my life without them there. I was in a pretty dark place for a long time and they helped me escape."

"Must be nice to have so many people care about you." She whispered to herself.

Toni looked towards her, as if she was trying to read through her.

"Cheryl can you at least tell me if that happened at school?" she said gesturing towards her cheek.

Cheryl felt her brain go into overdrive. She didn't want to dump all her problems onto someone and so she decided to keep it short and sweet. She started fiddling with her can as Toni stayed silent.

"Was it some dick at school?"

"No I just- I fell okay can we please not talk about this anymore?" she spat.

"Hey okay okay I won't talk about it anymore just know that you can tell me anything. I'm a pretty non-judgemental person shockingly enough." She said softly.

Cheryl stayed quiet trying to control her breathing as much as she could. She reached into her pocket and realised that she left her cigarettes in her car. Panicking she put her head in her hands feeling the itch of her addiction come on once again.

"Everything okay?"

"I forgot my cigarettes in the damn car." She groaned.

"Hang on a sec Sweet Pea must have some lying around here relax okay? I'll go get them."

Cheryl nodded, her head still in her hands.

Toni walked towards a corner and looked around eventually finding a pack of shitty branded cigarettes and walked back, taking one out of the packet and lighting it before inhaling once and giving it to the redhead. She muttered thanks and leaned her head back to rest on the torn up couch as she took a deep inhale closing her eyes as she felt herself relax. She continued to smoke with her eyes closed before she looked up and saw Toni staring at her. Toni realised shed been caught and coughed slightly as she took a cigarette out of the packet and lit one up, walking towards the small window staring out at the cloudy sky.

"So what's your story Cheryl? Where are you from, what do your parents do? Any siblings?" She said.

Cheryl faulted slightly. Not sure how much information she should give the pink-haired girl. But she decided it didn't really matter anymore.

"Well, born and raised in this precious dump," she said as Toni scoffed and chuckled slightly nodding her head. "And my parents own the maple business that practically runs this town."

"Funny, never liked maple syrup that much." Toni whispered as she glanced towards Cheryl who smiled and nodded.

"And yeah I have, well _had_ a twin brother. Umm, he just uh went missing last year and his body was found floating on Sweetwater river. He was shot in the head and they ruled it a suicide."

The whole time she had mentioned this, Toni had looked towards her in complete shock.

"I'm so sorry Cheryl. I don't even know what to say. Everything I could say just seems so trivial in the long run."

"Don't be sorry for something that wasn't your fault."

"Do you think it was a suicide?"

"No. but no one will believe the psycho twin sister."

"I believe you."

Cheryl looked up at her in disbelief. "Seriously?"

"Heck yeah. Riverdale is a fucked up town and anything is possible. There's definitely something more sinister that must have been involved."

"That's exactly what I've been saying! I was at the forest almost every night trying to see if I could find anyth-"

"Cheryl what the _fuck?_ That is literally the centre of Ghoulies territory and you're telling me you were out there searching for information at _night?"_ Toni practically screeched. She walked towards Cheryl standing above her. Cheryl got up staring her right in the eyes. Toni was shorter than her but her presence was more overpowering, even while Cheryl was towering over her; it was obvious that she was more intimidating.

"Toni I'm alive aren't I? A bunch of shitty pathetic excuses of human beings won't be able to intimidate me. I've been through too much fucked up things I don't fucking care what happens to me anymore I just want to get to the bottom of this shit." She said angrily.

Toni sighed staring at her worriedly.

"Cheryl I am in a literal gang and I'm afraid of going to the edge of the forest without backup. This isn't a joke. I get that you want to know what actually went down but getting yourself potentially killed in the process really won't help either." She said softly.

Cheryl sighed sitting back down and flicking her cigarette on the small ashtray beside her. Toni went to sit beside her, resting her elbow on the sofa as she took a drag of her cigarette, staring at Cheryl as if anticipating her next move.

 _How do I even begin to explain my situation to her?_

Cheryl's phone began to vibrate lightly in her pocket. She reached out from under herself and grabbed it. She sighed frustratingly as she read veronica's message. She would be spending the night at Archie's. Cheryl scoffed. Of course she would get back with him, not knowing what's good for her and what wasn't.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah its fine my friends ditching me to spend time with a stupid boy."

"That sucks. Well you can spend time with me today so stop stressing." She said with a smile.

"Yeah you're right. When do you have to start your shift?"

"I still have a couple of hours. What do you want to do?"

Cheryl just shrugged her shoulders staring at the smoke floating around her.

"Well we could always hang out at my place a bit if you don't like it here? But my place isn't any better."

 _Maybe she doesn't want to hang out with you. Hell she would probably get rid of you if she didn't have so much pity on you._ She thought to herself.

Before she could overthink any further, Toni grabbed her hand resting on her leg causing her to look towards her.

"Hey. You really do space out sometimes don't you." She said, smiling softly.

Cheryl scoffed. "Bad habit I guess."

"Come on, let's go to mine. We can just listen to music and chill if you want? That is of course if you want to. Fuck I've just been leading you around and haven't even asked if you want to actually hang out with me. I'm sorry." She said shaking her head and getting up.

"What? No of course not! This has honestly been great and I – uh really enjoy spending time with you I guess." Cheryl said as she got up to, rubbing her hands nervously together.

Toni smirked slightly, and for some reason Cheryl just stared at her. Her gaze flicking to the slight curl of her lips. "Well in that case, your carriage awaits." She said bowing slightly causing Cheryl to giggle and shake her head.

She had never felt so at ease. And the thought scared her. How was it possible to feel so comfortable around someone who was practically a stranger?

Suddenly they heard loud footsteps walking up the stairs. Cheryl looked at Toni in confusion. And before she could comprehend her reaction, Sweet Pea came tumbling in with wide eyes.

"Toni! Please don't do something stupid. It's your uncle. He's here with a bunch of ghoulies and he's asking for you. We told him you weren't here and hid your bike. Just don't come down whatever happens okay?" he said frantically before shutting the door as he thumped back down the stairs.

Cheryl felt her heart beat increase as she looked towards Toni. She was fuming. Her nostrils flared slightly as she stared at the door, practically battling with herself.

"Toni?"

Toni whipped her head towards Cheryl as realization dawned her. "Fuck Cheryl I have to get you out of here it's not safe."

"What? Why what's wrong? Why are ghoulies in this area?" she said hurriedly as Toni took her hand leading her towards the door. Cheryl stopped in her tracks pulling on Toni's hand causing her to turn around.

"We are not going out there! He literally just said we should stay here!" She hissed.

"I have get you out I wouldn't forgive myself if something happened to you. Fuck I shouldn't have brought you here Cheryl. I'm so so sorry. Now we have to go. It's gonna be fine you just have to stay quiet."

Cheryl let out a shaky breath before she nodded. What had she gotten herself into?


	5. Chapter 5

**hey, another update because I have no life. been feeling really empty these days and ive just found myself staring at the wall for days on end just smoking and thinking about sad shit that I shouldn't think about. hope you guys are great. feel free to pm me id love to talk to someone here about anything.**

 **Miss You - Gabrielle Aplin**

Every step they took seemed painfully loud, even amongst the arguments taking place beneath them. As they reached the last few steps, Toni turned towards Cheryl silently lifting a finger towards her own lips gesturing her to be quiet.

"FP, we need your services once more and we'll be out of this pretty little den and leave you to do whatever the fuck you're doing." A woman's voice spoke loudly.

"That is never happening again Penny. Your deal was dealt with; we have nothing left for you to blackmail us with. Now if I were you, I would leave while your legs still can."

She scoffed.

"Or maybe I should leave an anonymous tip with the police about the famous blossom boy and where he was…. Well, where he was _killed._ "

Cheryl stopped dead in her tracks. Toni felt her eyes widen in confusion.

"Penny that was something that stayed between y-"

"Between who? Us? When have you ever been trustworthy to us ghoulies? So not many know how you took a _northsider_ and helped get rid of him for a small cut of the very big fortune?"

There were murmurs from the surrounding serpents. Cheryl felt herself freeze completely as anger took over.

FP's voice bellowed as he took another step towards Penny, the serpents following behind.

"Penny. Leave."

She smirked as she backed away slowly, her eyes not leaving his.

"Even blossom had more guts than you. I can see the fear in your eyes FP. He didn't even flinch. Even when I had the trigger pressed up against his pretty mouth. Maybe I should do the same to you."

And that's when Cheryl saw red. She pushed herself off the wall she was hiding behind, beginning to walk towards them before she felt two strong arms pull her back and push her against the wall.

"Toni let g-"she couldn't finish the sentence as Toni covered her mouth muffling her words. Cheryl pushed with all her might trying as hard as she could to get out of her grip but she failed. Toni looked at her with frantic eyes begging her to stay quiet. And as the door shut, the murmurs became louder at the ghoulies departure.

With a new found strength she pushed Toni away.

"How do you know my brother? What the fuck did you do to him?!" she screamed, walking towards FP as everyone looked towards her now menacing form.

FP's eyes widened as if he'd seen a ghost. "H-how did you get in here?" he asked.

"Answer my fucking question damn it! Is what she said true? Did you get him killed? You fucking got the only person I cared about in this world killed and you're standing here alive with not a fucking care in the world? How could you?" she said as she walked further towards him until she was staring him down. No one dared interfere.

"What's wrong? Do I look too much like him? Do you see Jason in my eyes?" she said as tears poured down her face. She couldn't stop now. "This whole time, the murderers were right fucking in front of me. How could I not see it? I want answers FP. I want fucking answers." She screamed.

FP stood there, staring at the side, not looking in her eyes as she continued to try and stare him down.

"Sweet Pea get her out of here." He said silently.

And with that she felt two strong arms pull her back silently towards the exit. She struggled against him as he led her away.

"Hey! I got her let her go stop it." She heard Toni's voice in the background as her thoughts continued to numb her brain.

But Sweet Pea kept his hold on her until she was taken outside the building. He pulled her towards the side wall, keeping her there before she felt soft hands pull his arms away.

"I said let go of her you fucking dipshit. Now fuck off." She snarled.

"FP's orders Tiny, I'm sorry." He said with his hands raised.

She sighed as she looked towards Cheryl who had her head resting on the wall behind her with her eyes closed.

"Cheryl?" she stayed silent.

"Let's get out of here okay?"

She nodded silently as she lifted herself up from the wall she was resting on. Her face was pale as her eyes remained bloodshot.

"Take my truck. It's safer, we don't know where they are right now and if they're still looking for you. I'll bring back your bike tonight." He gestured towards Cheryl. "Take care of her, ill cover your shift." He said solemnly as he threw her his keys.

"Come on Cheryl." She said as Cheryl went for her outstretched hand. Toni squeezed it assuredly in her grasp as she led her towards the old red vehicle.

They sat in front together. Toni turned the keys with the truck taking three tries to start up. As they began their journey on the road, she glanced towards Cheryl who was looking out towards the trees around her. Toni reached out and turned on the radio, wanting the silence to not become awkward. The speakers blared as they drove down the highway leading to the trailer park.

No matter how hard Cheryl tried to hide her tears, her shoulders began to shake with the pain of her brother and how he must have felt. _How she wasn't there._

Toni pulled her towards her open shoulder, and Cheryl sobbed. Holding onto her for dear life as she mourned. The music masking her wailing as Toni kept one hand on the wheel and one kept her close. She rubbed her arm as she let her cry. Cheryl had never felt so pained and so … _comforted_ in a long time.

They stayed that way as Cheryl's sobbing subsided and she lifted herself up slightly and kept her head rested on Toni's shoulder. She didn't want this calm she now felt to stop. And as the lyrics hit her she felt her stomach physically ache with hurt.

 _Oh god I miss you too_

 _It's all I ever do_

 _I'm coming back to you_

 _And I won't let go of you_

"Hey were almost there. Do you want me to keep driving for a bit?" Toni whispered in her ear. She raised her head and nodded.

Toni simply smiled at her as she grabbed her hand, playing with her fingers slightly. The action immediately calmed Cheryl down and as she looked ahead at the road continuing beyond her, she realised how devoid of any affection she truly was. And that the mere action of holding someone's hand was bringing her so much happiness. It was sad really, but people were assholes. And the only reason most of them would interact with her would be for their own needs in the end. No one truly wanted to spend time with her if they didn't get anything out of it. And she knew that Toni barely knew anything about her, yet she was still ready to interact with her.

After driving for another half hour, Toni pulled onto a side road leading through different caravans before stopping by the side of one of them. She turned the engine of the truck off and lowered the volume of the radio before turning towards Cheryl, their hands still clasped together.

Cheryl looked towards her and didn't even bother to hide the way she stared at her. There was something about her that Cheryl found so mesmerising and she couldn't put her finger on it. As her eyes went up towards Toni's, she smiled softly, sniffling slightly.

"I don't even know how I can thank you Toni. You don't even know me and you're doing so much I don't know how I can repay you."

"It's nothing Cheryl. People like us need to stick together."

Cheryl scoffed slightly. "And what kind of people are we?" she said chuckling slightly.

Toni simply shrugged her shoulders. "People who view the world in a deeper way than most I guess. You just seem so sad to me. And it's the same sadness I see in myself." She whispered.

"I'm glad I found you Cheryl. I wish I'd met you sooner."

Cheryl felt herself freeze in shock. She didn't know how to react at Toni's statement and found herself just staring at her, smiling in awe. No matter how hard she told herself not to, she felt her attraction to Toni grow every moment they spent together.

"Just know that as long as you want to hang out with me, I would love to do the same. You're not as forgotten as you think Cheryl."

And with that, she got out of the truck walking towards Cheryl's door before opening it for her and grabbing her hand, helping her out with ease. Closing the door behind her, she led her towards her trailer.

"It's pretty shitty I have to warn you." She said.

"I bet it's great." Cheryl said with a genuine smile.

Cheryl entered Toni's trailer. And for the first time in 2 years, she felt calm. She felt resolved. She felt _whole._


	6. Chapter 6

**Hows life for you guys? Mines going shit but im trying to start leaving the house a bit more. I found this really nice forest that had amazing views of the mountains that I went to and smoked. it was a good change of scenery/**

 **heres the next chapter. I hope its not too much of a disappointment lol. Enjoy.**

 **I was all over her - Salvia Plath**

Upon entering. Cheryl was immediately engulfed in the warmth of the small space. It almost instantly gave her a sense of calm. Toni walked her towards the small, black, torn up sofa which sat in the middle of the space. She felt the foam sink beneath her as she looked up towards Toni, who was now walking back from the kitchen with a glass of water which Cheryl took gratefully. She gulped it down not realizing she was that thirsty.

"Do you have anywhere to be tonight? I was thinking we could maybe watch a movie and order pizza? O-of course that's only if you want to." Toni asked.

Cheryl smiled. "No I don't have any plans at all. That would be great. I could use the distraction."

Toni moved to sit next to Cheryl. A few inches between them. And Cheryl found herself missing the feeling of her touch, mentally scolding herself. _Jesus Cheryl you've known her less than a week calm down._

They ended up deciding on watching The Godfather which was Toni's favourite movie.

"Are you _kidding_ me Cheryl? You've never watched the greatest movie of all time?" she exclaimed as she clicked on the title.

"Um, no. And by the way this is so not the greatest movie of all time. That title goes to Gone with the Wind and you will not fight me on this."

"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn." Toni smirked as she watched Cheryl gape at her.

"Hey don't look so surprised that I know what that movie is. I'm appalled you've seen that but not this." She said motioning towards the TV.

And so Cheryl and Toni spent the next few hours glued to the TV screen. And Cheryl noticed that although she found the movie incredibly fascinating, her eyes would shift towards Toni more and more. Her mannerisms, the way she would tap her finger on her thigh when a stressful scene would appear, or how she would mouth the lines slightly in her mouth.

How her eyes would practically light up at some parts. It filled Cheryl with melancholia of sorts. To see someone as mature and bad-ass as Toni look as awed as a child. As the movie finished, Toni looked towards her and smiled. Practically giddy.

"So? How was it?"

"I loved it." Cheryl said simply as she smiled. "Not the greatest movie of all time though." She said after a pause, to which Toni faked shock.

"You wound me dear Scarlett!" she said as she reached a hand towards her forehead and fell dramatically back on the sofa. And Cheryl laughed harder than she ever had in 2 years. Toni soon joined in and as the laughter faded, a comfortable silence surrounded them.

"I'm gonna order us some food. Are you allergic to anything?" She said as she got up and walked towards the small phone hanging on the wall. Cheryl simply shook her head. After ordering her food, Toni sat back down with Cheryl as they both smoked another cigarette.

"When did you get into the habit of smoking?" Cheryl asked curiously.

Toni seemed in thought for a while before leaning forward, flicking the ashes in the small metal ashtray.

"I was 14. My parents were fighting and I decided, fuck it. I stole some of my uncle's cigarettes and went up to the roof with my speakers and drowned out the screaming and lit it up. It just calmed me down in a way I didn't really get the chance to feel my whole life. I guess I've been doing it ever since." She said, sighing slightly with an exhale. "You?"

 _"Come on Cheryl. Are you telling me you've never ever wanted to try it? It'll be fun. I promise."_

 _"Heather, no! It's literally a cancer stick why the fuck would I put it in my mouth. Ugh."_

 _Heather pouted, her auburn hair framing her features. And Cheryl found she could never say no to her best friend. She loved her. She loved her so much it ached. But Cheryl knows she could never admit to it, for she never wanted her to lose any ounce of friendship they had._

 _"Please Cherry, for me?"_

 _Cheryl sighed and took it from her, staring at it curiously._

 _"Okay so put it between your lips and take a long drag. Maybe try and inhale and take it into your lungs. That's the way you feel it hit you."_

 _And Cheryl did just that. She coughed and spluttered but because Heather wanted her to do so, she did it. And she hadn't stopped ever since._

"Tried it with a friend. I enjoyed it and shit started happening with my family and I just decided to keep doing it since it was the only thing that relaxed me." She said with a shrug.

Toni hummed in agreement. "I guess we can both relate to having weird shit with family hey." She said sadly. Cheryl looked towards her nodding.

"I guess so. It's never really been good for me at any time. After my brother died, my mother just absolutely lost it and my father's just been fucked up from the beginning. I never really had them teach me much in my childhood either. Which is why I made some fucked up choices and an absolute shit friend that ended up fucking with my head more than I thought."

"What happened?"

Cheryl hesitated slightly before realising she truly did trust Toni.

"I had a friend. Her name was Heather. She was everything to me. We met in 9th grade. She saw me sitting by myself one day and just came up to me. I'd never really been her friend before that but we just got close. I told her everything. I thought she was my best friend and I started to develop feelings for her," Cheryl started playing with the loose thread of her shirt. "And she decided to use that to her advantage. She played with my heart. She manipulated me. And in the end she used my money and my time when she felt like she needed a play thing. And one day she left. Just like that. I was devastated. I didn't eat for weeks. I kept trying to talk to her but she had blocked me everywhere and so I slowly accepted it. And now looking back on it I just cannot see why I didn't see how much of a _dick_ she truly was. And I hate how everywhere I look I think of her. There are some places I just can't go because I know that if I do I'll think of her. I can't even listen to some music because it just creates this ache in my chest at the thought of how she just left."

She aggressively wiped away the one tear of frustration that had managed to leave her. Laughing slightly she apologised.

"Hey that's nothing to apologise for. She sounds like a real bitch." Toni said angrily causing Cheryl to giggle.

"What's so fucking funny?" she said in mock anger as she crossed her arms.

"Nothing it's just your kind of adorable and tiny and then you try and look angry and you just look cute." Cheryl said smiling.

"I'll have you know I am in a gang I am not cute I am fierce."

"Okay." Cheryl said as she tried to hold in her laughter.

Soon after, their takeaway had arrived and Cheryl ran to the door insisting on paying until Toni reluctantly agreed.

"Honestly Toni, thank you. After everything that happened today, I just don't know what to say."

"Shut up stop thanking me." She said jokingly.

Cheryl got up and gathered her things.

"Are you going home after this?"

"Um, no. I'm gonna drive to a motel near Pops. I'll stay there for the weekend and go home after school."

Toni scoffed. "Yeah not anymore you're staying with me. That is so not safe."

"Toni I've literally been annoying you for like the whole day I am not gonna bother you any longer. Just take me to my car I'll be fine I promise."

"No. Cheryl its fine I honestly loved your company a lot. And I'm not going to have any issues with you staying. It's less lonely." She said as she looked up towards her.

And Cheryl decided to stay.

"My rooms over there pick out any clothes you want to and the toilets right next to it. I'll go clear up."

Cheryl nodded thanking her and went towards her room. It was smaller than she anticipated but for some reason it fitted her personality. The room was covered in black and grey paint with one wall completely covered with photographs and pictures. Her double bed looked comfortable in the corner of the room. Cheryl picked out a plain black shirt and some sweatpants. They were smaller for her but smelt just like Toni and she couldn't help but close her eyes and inhale into her shirt, feeling comfort immediately.

She walked out of her room and met Toni in the kitchen as she finished cleaning up.

"Okay maybe you're right. I am tiny." She said as she smiled softly looking up at her.

The tension in the air was palpable as Toni took another step towards Cheryl. Now it was getting harder for Cheryl to look her in the eyes as she kept drifting towards her lips. And as she felt her breath get closer, she closed her eyes.

A large bang at the door caused them to jump apart, before Toni instinctively moved in front of Cheryl, shielding her from the entrance.

"Toni, open up." She heard her Uncle call from outside. His raspy voice sending chills down her spine.

She whipped behind and grabbed onto Cheryl.

"Go to my room; don't leave no matter what you hear. Fuck he can't know you're here Cheryl do you understand?!" She nodded. "Now go!"

Cheryl ran towards the room closing the door quietly. Her heart rate increasing with every moment that passed.

Toni opened the door.


	7. Chapter 7

Cheryl kept her ear on the door as she heard Toni's voice loud and confident.

 **Hey, how are you guys doing? Hope you're doing okay? I'm... coping. Slept in a lot today.**

 **I have 2 songs for 2 different parts of the story this time. hope that's okay.**

 **guess I wont be sleeping till 4am lol.**

 **Run Baby Run - The Rigs**

"How the hell did you manage to come here? How _dare you._ "

He laughed as he looked around the trailer. Raising his hands in mock surrender.

"Come on now Antoinette. This is my home you've taken ov-"

"This is not your fucking home anymore. Not since you decided to leave and join the fucking Ghoulies it isn't. Now I suggest you get on with it or that you leave before Sweet Pea and Fangs decide to arrive for movie night."

Cheryl was impressed at how smoothly she had managed to threaten and lie to her uncle. She could feel the worry grow inside her at the thought of something happening to Toni. And at the same time she felt fear closing in on her. _Don't feel the same way for her as you did for heather. You'll be fucked Cheryl._ She thought to herself.

"I just thought I'd pop in and visit my favourite niece. Any new friends I should know about?" he said in a low tone that ran chills down Cheryl's spine.

Toni scoffed. "Does it look like I have time to make new friends? I'm too busy trying to clean up the fucking mess you pieces of shits leave around town."

That's when Cheryl heard the sound she remembers so vividly. A loud slap of fist meeting face rang through the small area. She brought her hand up to her mouth as she sank to the floor slowly. Trying as hard as she could to drown out the noise, she put her head between her legs. Catching glimpses of him speak.

"Just because you're blood… who else would have taken care of you… dare speak to me like this…" and as quick as they had entered, Cheryl heard the door slam shut. She got back up running out of the room towards Toni who was staring at the small door defiantly, her hands balled into fists. A single tear forcing its way out of her.

And Cheryl had never felt such a strong sense of overprotection since Jason. She went to stand between Toni and the door, causing her to look up towards her. Cheryl stared down at her and brought her hands to take her fists and lead her to the sofa. She looked towards her small hands, softly stroking her thumb across them as Toni kept her eyes down.

"I'm so sorry." She spoke softly, her voice cracking. Cheryl looked up at her confused.

"Why the hell would you say that Toni?"

"Everything that happened today was because of me. I took you to the worm, I brought you here. I just ruin everything, everywhere I fucking go. You shouldn't be here. I'm so fucking sorry." She sniffed slightly, looking at the now blank television screen with tears in her eyes.

"Toni. Look at me." She reluctantly turned towards her to be met with Cheryl's passionate eyes staring into her. Convincing her to calm down. "I promise you this is not your fault. And I know you took me to the worm but it's not something you could have controlled. And I hope you know that I'm so fucking grateful. You've been nothing but sweet to me and for the first time since Jason's death, I've felt _happy._ Even if it was for a short amount of time you've given me more emotion and affection than anyone I've known so far."

And Cheryl meant what she said. A part of her deep down was telling her to stop and back away before she got too close. Worried that what had happened with Heather would eventually happen to her again. But she also knew that Toni was different. She had actually cared about how Cheryl felt and what she wanted. Something she hadn't felt from anyone in a long time.

Toni's cheek had begun to turn a deep shade of red. Cheryl walked towards the kitchen after saying how she felt and grabbed an ice pack that was already stored in her small freezer. She saw a small speaker on the table beside the television and connected her phone, turning the volume higher as she played a song.

 **4AM –Girl in Red**

Walking back she silently turned Toni's face, placing a hand on her cheek to support her and placing the ice pack on it. Hissing slightly, her face relaxed in almost an instant as she closed her eyes, bringing her hand up to hold Cheryl's in it slightly. Cheryl felt how soft her hands were against hers and her stomach felt the same pain it felt before. It was something she couldn't even describe properly. As if her touch was both burning her and filling her with a sense of calm at the same time.

 _I'm thinking too much again_

 _I can't sleep, its 4am_

 _I got to be somewhere tomorrow_

 _I don't wanna go out tomorrow_

She had to go back home tomorrow. Cheryl felt her heart sink at the thought of it. But she knew that if she started thinking about it she wouldn't be able to cope. _Just enjoy the moments you have right now Cheryl. Stop thinking._

She found herself staring at Toni. She looked at peace. She was staring back at her. And Cheryl could see her eyes filled with a sort of maturity she hadn't seen in anyone. As the ice pack melted, she slowly brought her hand down, Toni's still enclosing in hers.

 _I'm thinking too much again_

 _How my life will end?_

 _I have to leave tomorrow_

 _I don't wanna leave tomorrow_

"It's a nice song." Toni whispered.

Cheryl hummed in response. Getting up to put the ice pack away.

"Thank you Cheryl."

Cheryl smiled.

She walked into the kitchen and returned the ice pack. Turning around she saw Toni picking up the packet of cigarettes on the counter.

"Do you wanna maybe go somewhere? Just for a ride or something. I'm sorry I just wanna get away from here for a bit if that's okay?" she said sighing slightly.

"Of course Toni. Where did you want to go? I highly doubt the Southside will be safe." She said cautiously.

"I know… I mean we could just drive to the northside somewhere and sit there?"

And so they left. Still in their sweatpants with their hair out, enjoying how impulsive and carefree this decision was. Gliding down the road with the moon shining a light above them. Music blared in Cheryl's ears as she enjoyed the moment she was in.

 _Fuck my thoughts_

 _I think too much_

 _I think too much._

"Hey Toni why don't we stop at Pops, get a drink or two?" Cheryl spoke in her ear.

Toni nodded and turned towards the diner that was thankfully open after midnight.

They walked in giggling slightly as Cheryl almost tripped over the bike. Pops was reading the newspaper and smiled when he saw Cheryl walk through the door.

"Cheryl dear. How are you?" He bellowed as he stood up from his chair.

"I'm great. Why the hell are you awake? You should be asleep Pops this is not good for your health at all! Where's Chris?" She said, asking about the night worker.

"Oh he wasn't feeling too well. And don't you worry about me child I'm gonna be just fine. Now come on, what would you like?" He said moving across the counter.

"Well I'll have my usual shake, what about you Toni?" she said turning towards the girl who was smiling sweetly at the exchange she had just witnessed.

She turned towards Pops. "I'll have the same as her. Thank you so much."

He nodded, walking towards the station and began to mix up the ingredients for their milkshake.

"That was so sweet Cheryl." She said when she saw he was distracted.

"What was?" She said, confused.

"That you're worried about Pops sleep."

"He's kind of always been there for me. I used to come into the diner stressed out at 4am trying to study for a test and he'd come sit with me and let me recite it to him correcting me if I was wrong. And he always had a soft spot for Jason, ever since he'd held a fundraiser to help keep him open when he was in a bad way of sorts." She said smiling sadly.

Toni grabbed her hand, squeezing slightly. Cheryl immediately felt herself relax.

"On the house Cheryl. And for the lovely young lady too." He said, as he brought the milkshakes in a takeaway container.

Cheryl scoffed. "Nonsense Pops don't try and give it back." She said, giving him a fifty dollar note, thanking him and walking out of the door without taking the rest of the change.

Toni followed suit, and they soon found themselves speeding towards an area Cheryl had told her to pull into. They began walking silently, not needing any light to find their way as Cheryl seemed to know where they were going. And soon the trees gave way to a large ledge overlooking the city.

"Cheryl this is beautiful. How did you find this place?"

"Jason found it one day when we were walking around after school. It's the only place I haven't told anyone about. Not even Heather, well until you."

"Well, I'm glad you chose me to show this place to. And I really appreciate it Cheryl. Truly."

They sat at the edge, legs dangling as they took sips of their milkshake and drags of their cigarettes. Talking about everything they possibly could. Not realising the hours passing by.

Toni giggled slightly all of a sudden. Cheryl looked at her trying not to look amused.

"Look its 4am and we can't sleep like in the song." She said giggling some more.

"Someone sounds a little delirious and tired I must say." Cheryl started giggling with her. They decided to walk back, hands held together as they made their way to the motorbike.

And so they decided to head back to the Southside, yelling and laughing, speeding through the trees and roads, both girls had never felt so alive.


End file.
